Mental Minefields

So, one of our four white mothers has discussed the idea of mental minefields with me. We heard the phrase and found it incredibly accurate. Mental minefields occur when you are going along in your day, doing just fine, and then you suddenly see something, smell something, hear something, do something, or even just have a random thought, and you are back in the moment. The moment could be remembering a tragic event, missing a lost chance at love, feeling the loss of amazing roomates, or, perhaps, just the remembrance of an experience. The actual remembrance of events incurred by the mental minefield could have occured eons ago, but they appear as if they were just 10 minutes ago. All of the feelings, trauma, experiences, and joy come rushing back in a painful, exploding minefield that seems to come from nowhere. Minefield implies no warning, after-the-fact, and no solution. Here comes a little bit of my IR talk, but do you know how hard it is to rid a war-torn country of minefields? Take Mozambique - it has been 14 years and will still take at least 40 to 50 more. They are hidden, and hidden well. They don't necessarily show themselves in times of battle, but can be right there, waiting for you to trigger them. Perhaps they just diminish with time, but the feelings that they trigger don't seem to follow that same trend. Anyways, I wanted to share a mental minefield experience with you all. I won't bore you with what triggered it, and these aren't even my own pictures, but I wanted to share this part of me with you. Perhaps it could be cathartic if it is partially recorded. (I am still working on getting some of my own photos up here!)

African sunsets have no equal. Not even California sunsets, though they are a close runner-up!


No matter how much you would hope, this is not an uncommon sight. The smoke is probably trash burning in the background. It happens a lot. This probably isn't even a designated dump. I don't think I ever actually saw a designated dump.

This is the harbor of Maputo, the capital city. There is such a mix of history, despair, hope, and life everywhere in thie country. What a contrast between modern life sitting next to the old.

So many amazing photos on the internet, and this one evokes the most emotion. Sheesh, I think I'm starting to tear up here in the computer lab. It doesn't help that "Dust in the Wind" by Kansas just came on the internet radio site that I am listening to. Well, I know that you are all probably sick of my redundant yearnings for a place and people that are so far away, so I will let you go. Just one last thought...tomorrow marks exactly 5 weeks since I arrived back from Africa...

Mental Minefields...